Releasing the Pressure

The Pressure.

You know, to perform, to be successful, to prevent bad things from happening, to lose weight.

When I finally got off the whirlwind I’ve been on for the past few weeks (Who am I kidding? It’s been months.) and looked around, I saw people putting tons of pressure on themselves: clients, friends, fellow coaches.

And me.

The belief is, “If I keep the pressure on, I’ll get what I want.”

Which translates to:
If I tell myself I’m fat and point out my flaws, I’ll lose weight.
If I beat myself up, I’ll do better.
If I worry enough, good things will happen.
If I do it perfectly, I will acceptable.

Can you see the problem here?

We say to ourselves,
Do bad/hard/heinous thing to get good thing.

Remember in school when you had to do equations and you learned that both sides of the equation have to balance or the world tilts on its axis or something? (Honestly I probably cut class that day.)

Same thing here.

We think the equation is:
Pressure=Desired Outcome

What it really is:
Pressure=Pressure.

I’m not going to get all math-y on you, what I’m trying to say is that we put the pressure on because we think that will get us what we want.

Doesn’t work, the equation is not balanced.

Here’s the part where your brain might explode a bit so grab a tissue to contain any unfortunate seepage, I’ll be here…

The key to your desired outcome is releasing the pressure.
Letting yourself off the hook.
Quitting the worrying.
Giving yourself a big ol’ break.

It’s making peace with yourself so you can lose weight.
It’s being kind to yourself so you do better.
It’s staying in the moment so you notice good things when they happen.
It’s doing it imperfectly and accepting yourself.

See? The equation balances.

And you get an A.

Want to practice releasing your pressure? I cooked up this handy worksheet you can download for free.

7 comments on “Releasing the Pressure
  1. Oh, Bridgette, you hit the perfect button today, girlfriend. I was just telling myself (despite being tired and wanting to play and be mindless for the evening…and having a strained back from sitting all day) that someone who wants success would be working tirelessly to create my content tonight.

    On top of that, you used a math analogy. Do … See Moreyou know I was once a high school math teacher? (I feel like Crawl in Son In Law – Pauly Shore – “I majored in that for a semester!) I love math geek stuff because it really works well for analogies.

    Thanks for turning off the headlights, as it were, so I can wander off safely into the woods for the evening.

  2. Thanks Bridgette. Just what I needed to hear. Too much pressure on myself lately. I’m doing it imperfectly and it’s ok 🙂

  3. Great post, Bridgette, really great!

    I particularly liked this part of it:

    If I tell myself I’m fat and point out my flaws, I’ll lose weight.
    If I beat myself up, I’ll do better.
    If I worry enough, good things will happen.
    If I do it perfectly, I will acceptable.

    Really shows me how foolish it is to do !!!

  4. You’ve been looking in my windows again, haven’t you Bridgette! Of course you might not have been able to see through all the steam I’ve created from the pressure I’ve been putting on myself. I’ve decided I’d rather shoot for a B and enjoy more of life than to strive for the A+ and miss out on all the fun. I need more recess!! Thanks Bridgette – this is an awesome article and oh, so timely 🙂

  5. Pingback: Weight Shift Coaching » The Oh Sh*t Response

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