Fun is a Four-Letter Word

I’ve been struggling with having more fun. Sounds kind of weird, right? I mean after all, fun is fun. And, I’m someone who’s changed her whole life just to have more fun. I coach people about having more fun so I should be all over it, right? To top it off, I’m kind of a funny person so shouldn’t I be living in a perpetual state of FUN? Yeah, wasn’t exactly working out that way. Welcome to my work.

My coach-friends were actively coaching me on having more fun using great tools like making lists, making time for fun, exploring my beliefs around why I’m not having fun–all that stuff we know to do. None of it was sticking. And worse would be when one of them kindly asked, “What do you really WANT?’ That question was enough to make my brain seize up for days.

Then, with the help of another coach-friend, I accessed a higher source–call it Spirit, God, my Higher Self, Guides–I think of it primarily as a power greater than me; greater than my own mind. And what I found there was a very funny and kind message:

Fun is a four-letter word for me.

I was making the concept of “fun” mean a bunch of stuff. “Fun” had to rise to some impossible standard of good times, raucous laughter, excitement, or adrenaline rush. “Fun” was like a drug fix, a pleasure-seeking activity to give my brain a big ol’ hit of dopamine. Turns out “fun” was not what I was looking for. So when I tried to think of fun things, I would get nada–because nothing met this high yet crappy definition I was holding in my mind. I could redefine fun, but honestly that word and I had baggage, it just wasn’t going to work for me anymore.

Time for a new word.

Delight.

Ooooh.

I mean, OOOOOOH!

The word brought tears of joy to my eyes. Now I was onto it.

Delight is relaxing, it’s easy, it does not come with any standard. It just is. And it is fabulous for me. I can easily think of a TON of delightful things. And even better, my new question to go with my new word:

What would be delightful right now?

Turns out doing the dishes is delightful sometimes.
Writing this blog post is delightful.
Watching my dog Scruffy play with her new toy is totally delightful.
Funny email and Facebook exchanges–delightFULLLLL! (That’s me saying it like Oprah.)
Deleting emails I decided not to deal with because they didn’t feel delightful–delightful!
Afternoon Delight (the song and the concept)–delightful.

Turns out, I’m surrounded by delight. I do delightful things all day long. Now that I let go of this lofty concept of “fun,” I see the delight all around me. It was always there, I was just so busy seeking “fun” that I didn’t notice it. And even better, I’m using my super new question as my guide through the day–if it’s not delightful, I’m not doing it.

14 comments on “Fun is a Four-Letter Word
  1. Oh, thank goodness for your wisdom, Bridgette. I struggle with the same thing and DELIGHT sounds so much easier. Going to give it a shot starting right now.

  2. Hey Bridgette!

    We are having parallel discoveries… I love it! “Fun” doesn’t work for me, but “delicious”? THAT feels shackles off…

    Have a delightful Sunday!

  3. I love this Bridgitte! You are so right, FUN can have such a lofty, hard to reach feel whereas delight feels easy breezy! I struggle at times with making my time with my son super FUN because I only have him half the time. Having time that is delghtful for both of us seems so much more achievable!! Thank you, B, you rock the house, seriously delightfully! xo

  4. Oh Thank You so much for this post.I’m so lucky I stumbled across your blog today. That first part of the post could have beeen written by me word for word. And then the revelation – exchange it with DELIGHT !!!! What a word, brought tears of relief to my eyes. That will be my new word now as well and I know that my life will be so delightful instead of lacking fun…… Thanks a million times, Annette

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  6. I love this post, Bridge. I’ve been considering a similar question–what if there’s nothing to fix, what if I’m okay right now, just as I am, even when I’m not okay? I’m finding it’s the fastest and most DELIGHTFUL question to bring me to peace. Your wise words help me confirm my direction.

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